


Will everybody please give him a little bit of space

by secreterces5



Category: Adventure Time
Genre: Blood, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Gen, Identity Issues, Mother-Son Relationship, Self-Harm, Songfic, bleeding sentient lemon, centered around the present Lemongrab
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-15
Updated: 2019-01-20
Packaged: 2019-10-10 16:01:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,827
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17429054
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/secreterces5/pseuds/secreterces5
Summary: Inspiration: “This is home” by Cavetown (I strongly recommend both the song and the musician)Lemongrab doesn’t always feel all that fine and sometimes it shows. He doesn’t want to bring anyone else into his mess, but his condition is getting worse and he’s losing control over his torn up mind.





	1. Stress of falling out of it

**Author's Note:**

> Because he worries about losing control, Lemongrab tries to distance himself from everyone.

**Often I am upset**

**That I cannot fall in love**

 

“I don’t think I can do this,” Lemongrab sighed. Him and Lumpy Space Princess were sitting under a lemon tree in one of the earldom’s gardens and up until now they were sitting in what at first sight seemed like a content silence.

It wasn’t content or comfortable to him. He felt tense and scared and like any second now he could pass out from sheer stress.

“Do what?” she said, knowing full well what he was talking about, but hoping she was mistaken.

Lemongrab hummed in discomfort. “Well… date you. I can’t date you right now.”

LSP gasped. “What? Are you lumpin’ breaking up with me right now?”

“You’re not to blame!” he hurried to assure her. She didn’t seem to believe that.

“Oh yeah, sure, bring in the ‘it’s not you, it’s me’ crap,” she rolled her eyes but jumped when Lemongrab caught her hand.

“Really, LSP,” he said in the most serious–but–calm voice of his. “There isn’t anything wrong with you. But there is with me and I need time to figure it out. On my own.”

This left her a little baffled. “Babe… If there’s anything I can help with…”

“I want to fix it on my own,” he repeated, shaking his head.

 

**But I guess**

**This avoids the stress of falling out of it**

 

He could see the hurt in her eyes, but when she spoke, there was also understatement in her voice. “If you think it’s better that way.”

It won’t be better. He’s going to sit in his castle, surrounded by so many subjects and yet completely alone. He’s going to have to deal with the screaming prisoners inside of his body, he will be worrying the whole day that perhaps he lost control and doesn’t remember, and the migraine he could already feel getting on would only be worse with each passing second.

He nodded, trying hard to keep down all the voices yelling for his attention, attempting to steal his tongue and his voice, attempting to scream at her to get out of his sight,  _ shE’S NOT LEMON, SHE DOESN’T UNDERSTAND, SHE CAN’T EVER UNDERSTAxcept she does, she does she does we need her please please please don’t leave us alone here pleNLY LEMON, NONE OTHER KNOWS we can’t do this to her we can’t do this to us don’t let her leave– _

“Lemongrab?”

He snapped out of the momentary frozen state and had to blink a few times to chase away odd colours flashing in front of his eyes. Lumpy Space Princess was floating and so had to look down at him, but she still held his hand, a look of concern on her face.

_ How long have I been…?  _ “I’m so sorry,” he mumbled in a small voice. “I really have quite a mess to make better.”

 

**Are you tired of me yet?**

**I'm a little sick right now**

**But I swear**

**When i'm ready I will fly us out of here**

 

“Okay,” she nodded. She wasn’t angry anymore, but that didn’t help that much. What did feel nice though was when LSP pulled him in for a hug. “But listen to me and listen well,” she told him, feeling more brave now when she didn’t have to look him in the eyes, “whatever’s going on, if you need to talk or feel like you’d appreciate some help, you have my number. And Finn’s, and Bubblegum’s. And we care, so please remember that, ‘kay LG?”

He choked on tears he was trying to hold back. They wouldn’t help. They would make it worse, being around them made it worse. And then they would hate him. They would hate him because he would be just like they were, wrong in so many ways and  _ evil _ and  _ we weren’t evil are we evil WELL WE DON’T CARE FOR THEIR JUDGEMENT but they were there for us FOR OUR FALL OUR DEATH O u R  r E b I r T h _

He accompanied her to the edge of his ealrdom. Before she left, she made him promise to visit from time to time and keep in touch with at least one of the few friends he had. He promised, but didn’t plan on actually doing so.

They couldn’t understand the lemon ways. The lemon ways were only his, and if he didn’t focus enough, he would go in too many directions at once.


	2. Turn off your porcelain face

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> His condition has been getting worse. But this is his worst episode yet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is self harm in this chapter, and bleeding lemons. Also Bubblegum is being a somewhat good parent for once in her damn life.  
> I have actually researched what happens during bloodloss, so this is as accurate as it can get in a fanfic about a suicidal lemon.

**I'll cut my hair**

**To make you stare**

 

_ i can go on like this _

_ I WON’T GO ON LIKE THIS! WE NEED _

_ to separate _

_ TO SPLIT _

_ MOTHER PRINCESS FORCED US TOGETHER _

He tried to break out of it, he couldn’t let them talk to him, they didn’t know what it meant to be the good, honestly good, not meaning the taste or the survival or the fight but good as in a good person–

_               we can be good persons we know how to be _

_                                WE WILL BE WHAT SHE WANTED US TO BE _

_    a son _

_        A KING _

_   a friend _

_     A SUPERIOR CLONE _

He gritted  their his teeth. “She cared, she wants us to–”

_        CUT HER THREAD _

_               we can help she will see we can help if there’s _

_                           M o R e _

All of a sudden, someone kicked in the door.

“Lemongrab! What in Glob’s name are you doing?!” a voice he faintly recognized as Mother Princess’s shouted in horror.

Yes, what was he doing? He looked down at himself, at his hands, one of them was holding a… A dining knife? But… there was no food on the… table… He saw an arm, bleeding, and realized that he was in pain, but why, what was happening, why was Bubblegum here, what did she  _ want _ , he has work, he has to separate them, tear them away from each other, pull them apart, pull… himself… apart?

Finally, somewhere in his brain, something clicked.

The blade dropped to the ground with a noise too loud, too echoing, it shouldn’t be echoing, why did the falling knife cause an echo?

He watched as the knife started getting closer even though it was still laying on the ground, and then his head hurt a bit more all of sudden.

 

**I'll hide my chest**

**And I'll figure out a way to get us out of here**

 

Princess Bubblegum rushed to Lemongrab’s side with a yelled order: “Get me some bandages immediately!”

The seemingly empty room didn’t change in the slightest, so she groaned in frustration. “Your earl is going to  _ die  _ if you little morons don’t get me some bandages  _ right now _ !”

Hesitantly, two short lemon servants that hid inside this castle’s wall approached her with what she assumed to be a first aid kit. She was correct, when they opened it there were numerous items for all kinds of injuries and she thanked Glob Lemongrab or someone who was managing this had enough common sense to not have them be made out of any form and/or kind of lemons.

As she did her best to stop his body from bleeding out, she noticed that the carvings in his skin were following odd patterns, not straight lines but rather odd shapes, and it took her a full minute to realize what she was looking at.

Something deep inside her made her lungs stop functioning momentarily.

He had traced over the scars left after his surgery, after she had sewn both past Lemongrabs together.

 

**Turn off your porcelain face**

**I can't really think right now in this place**

 

When finished bandaging his arms and his chest, Bubblegum looked up at the two lemonboys that awkwardly stood beside her, waiting for any other orders. “Is there a carriage and someone who can take us to a hospital?”

Wordlessly, one of them gestured to somewhere she didn’t see and before she knew it, a line of more of them formed. They ran out from under furniture and from behind paintings and once there were enough of them, they carried both her and Lemongrab all the way to the stables.

This was one of the oddities of Lemongrab’s castle because he himself admitted once to have never taught them that, they just started doing it. She had to say it was weirdly comfy, and they were very careful with their earl as well.

There was a lemoncamel with a carriage prepared for them in the stables and a different creature ready to take Bubblegum and Lemongrab to the nearest hospital, she however demanded them to take him to her Candy Kingdom for a proper treatment. She didn’t think a medicine consisting entirely of lemons wouldn’t help even Lemongrab himself.

 

**There's too many colors**

**Enough to drive all of us insane**

 

She watched the land around them go by, once a sand desert and nothing else, now a pretty prosperous small earldom, and as the carriage moved along, her eyes became unfocused, her mind filling with images resembling what was now happening, one of her creations almost taking over her kingdom, other only momentarily pacifying him before making everything even worse and causing the earldom to become a prison for its citizens, and a third of the Lemongrab kind, who should’ve been perfect. Why wasn’t he? Where could she have gone wrong with him?

_ Well, I could’ve probably sewn him together with more precision. Or make him a different fruit. Or talked to him more,  _ she rolled her eyes at herself.  _ Same old me, making the same mistake over and over again like nothing’s changed. _

*

Marceline was wandering the halls of the Candy Kingdom’s castle in search of something she could get some red sucked out of, when she was almost ran over by her girlfriend.

“There you are, Bonnie!” the vampire smiled and wanted to greet her until she saw Bubblegum’s expression. The princess looked exhausted, like she had sprinted a mile, and she smelled very intensely of lemon. “Woah, did you visit Lemongrab and go for a swim in lemonade or something?”

Only now did Bubblegum really take notice of Marceline and she gasped out: “Marcie, I– Lemongrab, he tried to– he tried to kill himself!”

“Oh Glob, really? Is he okay? Where is he?”

“He’s here in the hospital, but Marcie, he tried to– to–”

Marceline gently laid her hands on Bubblegum’s shoulders and practically forced her to sit down. “Breath, girl.”

The princess tried to oblige, but once she was safely sitting on the ground she started talking again: “He tried to kill himself, Marceline! He tried to trace all of the stitched parts with a knife and he did it with such precision – but he couldn’t have remembered! He can’t remember that accurately, and his scars were almost gone, and when I ran in there I saw him and he was so scared and so confused…”

Slowly, her words stopped spilling out of her mouth and she hung her head low. “I think he’s gone insane again, Marcie.”


End file.
